Uni High Gargoyle Staff Blog

I feel the need to give strokes to a few people. Their deeds are not necessarily more deserving of these strokes than other people’s accomplishments but there definitely is a greater sense of originality and meaning that pervades through the actions of this group as compared to other’s.

I’m talking about the group of students who are part of United for Uganda’s (UFU) new initiative for raising money to donate to the Uganda Children of War Rehabilitation Project. The plan is to make a promise to sacrifice something that costs you money. The money that you save will then be donated to the rehabilitation center.

For example, one member has agreed to forgo the multiple cups of coffee from Espresso that she buys every week. She has promised to limit herself to a single cup of coffee per week and give the money that she would originally have spent on her hot drink to a good cause.

The amazing thing about this idea is that you get more involved with the act of donating than simply digging into your pocket and pulling out cash. It’s more of a sacrifice and a personal gift, which I think brings more meaning to the entire concept of donations. Each person is responsible for their own actions and at the end of the day their donation is a reflection of how well they kept their promise. The freshness of this idea and the amount of personal effort that is put into accomplishing this is worth recognizing.

A Uni parent has even gotten involved and has struck a deal with his child. He agreed to donate 50 cents for every piece of clothing that his daughter donated to Goodwill. She has given up 100 items of clothing and made $50.

The uniqueness of this concept goes beyond the idea of making donating personal. It extends to the concept that by making a concession you are also curbing your own indulgences and restraining yourself from superfluous luxuries.

Another member has decided to cut down on the number of times she eats out every week. She promises to no longer eat out before every basketball game like usual. Instead, she has decided to bring her own snack from home and donate the money she would have spent buying food from Za’s to UFU’s cause.

More often than not people who give up their pocket change as donations do so simply to get rid of a guilty moral conscience. But the actions exemplified by this group of students give more value to the act of donating a few dollars, and I truly applaud the efforts of those who have committed themselves to sacrificing something for a better cause.

— Shivani Khanna

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 5:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I admit it: I’ve got a guilty pleasure. I absolutely love reading horoscopes. And yes, I know that someone probably made it all up for fun. I know that the odds of my life actually matching up to the horoscope is one in a million. But I still think that it’s really, terribly fun.

For one thing, reading about what “the heavens have decided” for you gives you a sense that the universe actually cares about what happens to you, which is always a good feeling to have. If you really want me to be cynical, I will: The heavens and planets probably don’t care about you, because you’re just one more blob among billions on a round little thing spinning in the middle of space.

I rather like the idea being cared about more. So there you go.

Secondly, when some aspect of a horoscope is right, it’s interesting to have that eye-widening, jaw-dropping reaction. Hang on, you think. Does that actually say what I think it does? It’s like serendipity. And as I said before, it really does make you feel like your life has a purpose. Which is pretty cool, don’t you think?

Finally, I think horoscopes are absolutely brilliant because of how much you laugh when they are absolutely, horribly WRONG. It’s also fun (if you have no life, like me) to read different horoscopes and compare them. Quite often, they’ll directly contradict each other. Which is funny to me.

… Right. I’ll just go read my horoscope for tomorrow, then.

— Michelle Gao

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 10:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

No offense, but Spirit Week is kind of lame. I know that, with something like this, you get out of it what you put in. So maybe I dislike Spirit Week because I have yet to participate in one of the themes. (In my defense, I don’t wear pink, and my only orange shirt was in the laundry today.) But at the same time, I can’t help but think that the quest for school spirit may be a lost cause.

First of all, at most schools, kids get really into Spirit Week because sports are a really big deal, and supporting the teams is a huge part of their life. Thus, showing their spirit comes naturally.

Also, at public schools, where you can’t wear hats or pajamas to school, a Spirit Week offers a fun opportunity to do something out of the ordinary. Yet, at Uni, we can wear hats and pajamas every day. So Spirit Week isn’t even that special. (Perhaps we should have Gang Sign Day or Naked Day; those would be new and different.)

In addition, at other schools there are more fun events. A dance at the end of the week often gives students something to look forward to, and a pep rally provides an exciting atmosphere. There is also more incentive to participate at other schools. At Columbus North High School in Columbus, Ind., they have “Drive Your Tractor to School Day.” Thus, students have the opportunity to show off their cool John Deere equipment.

Yet, at Uni, we have no dance (and even if we did it probably wouldn’t be fun). Our school assembly was changed from a funny, engaging faculty basketball game to a volleyball game that is definitely not as cool. Neither Shruti nor Anna won the dance competition last year, a clear indicator that something is wrong. And finally, we don’t have a Friday home basketball game this week, so there is no good time for students to pack it into Kenney.

All in all, I don’t necessarily think we should put an end to Spirit Week. It is a good idea and provides something fun for students who participate. But maybe we could breathe a little more life into the whole event. Perhaps a faculty soccer game and an Orthodox Jew Day would provide more entertainment and a wider appeal.

— Sarah Pfander

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 10:29 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

For me, third quarter is not a pleasant time. For whatever reasons, I find myself stunningly unmotivated and apathetic, while endless distractions drift invitingly across my path. (Incidentally, I have discovered that visiting Wikipedia is probably the single worst mistake that a homework-laden student can make.) I find that I can listen to music while doing certain types of homework, especially math and chemistry, without serious impediment, but trying to memorize flowcharts or do Japanese workbook pages with music in the background is as counterproductive as writing a novel in the sand at low tide.

From personal experience, I consider long-distance running to be a suitable analogy to the school year. In the first quarter, I’m basically coasting on adrenaline, with plenty of energy to spare.

As shown in the graph, while my energy level (green line) drops, the repetitiveness and general apathy (blue line) increases. Since energy starts out considerably higher, there’s a happy time while I am both energetic and positive-minded. However, sometime in the second quarter those two trends intersect, and after that (at least until a second wind kicks in) I am both running out of steam and beginning to lose hope that the end will ever come. The passing of the halfway mark (with the added relief of winter break) is an enjoyable event (the dip in the blue line) that offsets the apathy, so I don’t truly start feeling the negative effects until the third.

During that third quarter, tasks that once seemed trivial become considerable undertakings. I want to slow my pace a bit, but I know that do so is only digging my grave a bit deeper. It feels like running on a treadmill set at a fixed speed - to falter is to get swept away.

In the last quarter, though, the light at the end of the tunnel suddenly seems brighter and more attainable than ever before. Even though those last few tests/laps are the most taxing at surface level, mentally I’m stronger than ever.

So while I’m struggling through these dark winter days, at least I have something to look forward to.

—Andrew Lovdahl

NOTE: If this blog did not leave you satisfied, blame the industry for making such blatantly distracting music.

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 6:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

It seems that everywhere I turn these days someone is sick. Both teachers and students alike are falling to whatever this disease is. They may be coughing, blowing their nose, or simply looking ill.

This is of course, assuming that they are here at all. If I don’t turn and see someone sick, I’m probably looking at an empty desk. Every period, the first minute or so seems to be spent asking if so-and-so is here. People are staying home for days and it seems that only in the past day or two have the first people to fall ill started to return, as others continue to disappear.

With all this, I am shocked to find that I feel perfectly healthy (albeit a little tired, but that is hardly out of the ordinary here). Yet surrounded by all this sickness I can’t help but feel that my days among the healthy are numbered, and that soon, I too will fall to this bug.

All I have to do is survive the next week or two without getting sick. And at least those who are staying home are resting, getting better, and not exposing me and the rest of the healthy students any more than we already have been.

However, I fear that if I do come down with this illness all the tissues in Uni will be gone — already used up by the first people to get sick…

— Deren Kudeki

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 6:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Usually, when I see the words free, legal, and music in the same sentence, it means nothing.

There are many places on the Web where you can legally download free songs, but virtually all of those songs are from artists you’ve never heard of and probably never need to hear of. That’s not to say that all freely available tracks suck — a very, very select few are decent — but still.

Anyways, what caught my attention about Ruckus.com was its large collection of songs that you actually hear people talking about and listening to. I registered for an account and did a test search for The Fray, whose album “How To Save A Life” has been very popular for quite a while now.

All of the songs on that album were available for download. To see how well it worked, I selected my two favorite — “How To Save A Life” and “Over My Head” — and within about a minute, I was able to play them back in both Ruckus’ own player (which is required to download the songs) and Windows Media Player 11. The tracks were pretty high-quality, too: 192Kbps WMA files.

But of course, there is a catch. Three catches, actually — for starters, you have to have an email address ending in “.edu” to even sign up. Uni students need not worry about that, though, since @uni.uiuc.edu addresses qualify.

Secondly, these tracks are copy-protected (DRM‘d, in other words). You can only play them back on your computer — you won’t be able to burn them to a CD or transfer them to another device. For a small monthly charge, you gain the rights to transfer them to a compatible portable device — but, unfortunately for many, the iPod isn’t one of them.

However, DRM is far from flawless. I remember reading a news article once with a quote that went something like, “Trying to make digital files not copyable is like trying to make water not wet.”

The RIAA should already know this (and hope that you never do so), but there are ways to strip the DRM from the tunes you download from Ruckus (without taking a microphone and recording whatever comes out of your computer’s speakers). Tunebite, for instance, re-records your DRM-protected songs in high speed and converts them to unprotected music files that you can play back on other devices and burn to CDs. Still, even with their “high-speed dubbing” technology, it can easily take hours to “convert” just a few albums’ worth of songs.

I’d imagine that the most commonly asked question about Ruckus is how the service could possibly be legal. Well, it is legal — it’s ad-supported, and luckily, I found that the ads aren’t very intrusive. Firefox users could even enjoy an ad-free experience with the Adblock extension.

As you might expect, removing the DRM from the songs you download isn’t exactly legal, but only your conscience could (or will) stop you from doing it. The RIAA definitely wouldn’t be happy if you did it, but nobody likes them anyways.

Oh, and that third catch — Mac users are initially out of luck. Because of the Windows Media DRM, the download client is available for Windows only. If you remove the DRM, though, the songs suddenly become playable on Macs (and iPods, and basically anywhere else music files can be played). Man, the reasons to rid the DRM are piling up….

Overall, Ruckus sounds like the perfect thing for college students (and priveledged high school students like us who have .edu emails). According to the Daily Illini, though, Ruckus actually started three years ago. It was originally a paid service available only to students of the 100 or so colleges it was partnered with. Back then, it wasn’t such a big deal, and students generally weren’t very interested in it.

Even though their basic service is now free, it’s unclear to me whether students will actually care much about it. I’m sure the majority will appreciate the free songs, but be turned away by the fact that the songs won’t play on their iPod. For those students without iPods and those that just want to listen to songs on their computer, though, this is seriously awesome.

And for those who have an iPod but also find out about Tunebite (and can wait overnight for downloaded songs to un-DRM-ify), they’ll never need the iTunes Music Store again!

Needless to say, the Gargoyle cannot be responsible for whatever you do with Tunebite, mmkay?

Mmkay.

—Jason He

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 3:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Death is the foundation for fear. Whenever you are afraid of something, chances are that your fear is linked to death in some way. There are a few exceptions such as being afraid to take a test, trying to perform well in an audition, or making public speeches, but other fears, such as being afraid of the dark and cowering from heights, are very much death-related. Death is perhaps an interesting topic because, believe it or not, all people die. The truth hurts.

Humans have been obsessed with death since they first began living. Religion most likely started as a result to make death less frightening. In some cases, when you die, you end up in heaven. Other times you go to hell. Perhaps you will be reincarnated? Or maybe there isn’t an afterlife and you just lie in the earth eternally without thought - eternal sleep. It’s a mystery that everyone has thought of at some point.

Some people live (or die) for their religion; religion plays as the center of their world. Me? I have my own religion; I make it up as I go on. Sounds a bit ridiculous, but it makes more sense to me than anything else. Growing up without going to Church or following any practices, all my ideas come from myself. Of course, I have friends and people to influence my beliefs, but I don’t take anything for granted.

What do I think? When people die, I don’t expect them to go anywhere. I don’t expect there to be a heaven or hell. I don’t expect there will be any afterlife. When I die, I’ll probably feel nothingness - the same nothingness as when I sleep. Sometimes I stay up all night thinking about death. Sometimes I wonder if I will be able to wake up alive in the morning. It is perhaps even more disturbing that if I don’t wake up alive, I would never know I had died.

I hope I’m wrong. I hope there is an afterlife to look forward to. I hope there is something after life that is worth living for or else why do I live at all? Why do I exist? It is somewhat pointless to ask a question that can’t be answered, but it’s worth a shot.

— Alan Liang

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 12:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I am an avid tennis fan both on and off the court. Whether it’s scraping my way against someone at the Atkins Tennis Center on campus or watching an intense match up of the final game in a major tournament, there’s something about the sport that demands my total attention.

Unlike other local high schools such as Centennial, Central, and Urbana, Uni does not have a tennis program, which means I cannot play on a high school team. I therefore make the Atkins Tennis Center, where the men and women’s University of Illinois tennis teams are situated, my tennis haven. An excellent facility, Atkins is open to the public for classes and personal court times, as well as a chance to watch the U of I tennis teams play. If you’ve ever wanted to try out the machine that automatically shoots out tennis balls, this is the place for you.

I also closely follow pro and college level tennis. One of the biggest recent stories in sports would be Swiss tennis star Roger Federer’s capture of the Grand Slam title against Chilean Fernando Gonzalez without dropping a single set. The last time someone accomplished such a feat was in 1980, when Bjorn Borg defeated Vitas Gerulaitis to wn the French Open.

Although I don’t bring multiple rackets to every game I play or have posters of tennis stars on every wall in my room, I appreciate the game to the last point. Whoever says love means nothing to a tennis player seriously needs to play a match with me.

— Benjamin Fu

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 9:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I’m sensitive. I know this (which doesn’t stop people from telling me). By sensitive I don’t mean sensitive skin, or sensitivity to light, etc. but plain old “If I see violence against unarmed people I cry” sensitive. I also have “people dying of incurable disease” sensitivity, and “babies somehow getting hurt” sensitivity.

Overall I see this as a good thing. It’s a good character trait to not want people to get hurt, especially if those people are infants. But sadly, I can’t just be shocked and appalled at these things when they appear in movies, documentaries, books, video games, magazines, or television (among others). Most violent occurrences (when they appear in the aforementioned media outlets) make me cry.

This is quite embarrassing, especially since violence is regularly lectured on in history class, featured in movies, and showcased in both television shows and the news. My frequent outbursts, when they receive attention, usually lead to either hugs (if females are present) or ridicule (if my companions are males), both of which are unappreciated.

But before you label me as a crybaby, know that those tears are (usually) tears of anger and an overwhelming desire to do something to help, which usually backfires because I’m too busy crying to do anything. I see this tendency as a serious impediment to my career choice: aid work in impoverished places. Hopefully by then my tear glands will have dried up from overuse and it won’t be a problem anymore.

— Bethany Hutchens

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 11:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

There are many affable people who become significantly less likable on their jobs, like telemarketers and IRS auditors. Last week, I went to the dentist.

It had been a while since my last visit, and the dental hygienist greeted me politely as she told me to lie down on the dentist’s chair. At least the chair is comfortable, I thought, but only a minute later, the sharp metal tool I found scraping at the border between my teeth and gums dispelled any illusions that this was going to be fun.

After the preliminary cleaning and flossing, which had left me wishing for less crowded teeth, the next step was to brush my teeth. To you, that may seem innocuous enough. But it doesn’t work as well when someone else is doing the brushing.

The mechanized toothbrush spun at a furious rate, reverberating through all my teeth and spraying some kind of gritty toothpaste everywhere. I was allowed, thankfully, to occasionally rinse. However, at the dentist’s, this consists of squirting a thin stream of water into the mouth, only to have it immediately sucked out through the funny-looking nozzle of a tube. I wondered how long brushing would take if I rinsed this way at home, while many more particles accumulated at the back of my mouth.

The hygienist was obviously sympathetic upon noticing that my gag reflex indeed worked, but she still seemed annoyed that I wasn’t opening my mouth wide enough. I was only thinking about the future, concentrating on that hypothetical moment when the ordeal would be over.

Finally, it was over, but there was still the fluoride treatment. The hygienist handed me a cup of foamy pink liquid and ordered me to swish it in my mouth. She didn’t offer me a choice of flavor.

They used to always offer three flavors—bubblegum, mint, or grape was the usual selection—and I would never have a preference. This time, they must have remembered my indecision or more likely, realized I was too old for that.

As I poured the sharp liquid into my mouth, however, for the first time I wondered if a more prudent selection of flavor could have spared me some misery. Whatever the taste was supposed to mimic, I could not identify it with anything edible.

Thirty seconds later, having passed this ultimate trial, I asked for a glass of water to purge the offending taste. No such luck. Apparently, any food or drink within the next thirty minutes would ruin the whole treatment.

Luckily, though, no cavities. I was safe from the dentist’s more sinister toys for now.

As I walked out of the dentistry, the strong aftertaste of the fluoride solution hung in my mouth. It reminded me, unfortunately, of a Robitussin cough drop I once tried. I have never considered taking another Robitussin cough drop since.

Thirty minutes later, as soon as I could fill my mouth with a part of my lunch, I guess it wasn’t so bad. There was, at least, the consolation that I had missed two periods of school. Even so, I’m not exactly excited about the next appointment.

— Alex Zhai

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 6:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

It’s that time of year again. On February 4, 2007, the entire nation will clear their schedules and postpone all their plans. America will be preoccupied with the most popular sporting event of the year: the Super Bowl. What other sporting event can create such a social impact? Truth is, the Super Bowl is the only sporting event that can take America and sweep her off her feet.

The popularity of the Super Bowl is uncontested. It is by far the most watched television program of the year. On average, around 80 to 90 million people watch the game and around 130 million tune in during some part of the game.

Guess how much companies pay for a commercial spot in the Super Bowl. If you said $ 1 million, then you are close. In fact, an average 30 second Super Bowl commercial costs around $ 1.8 to $ 2 million. The gives the perfect chance for advertisers to run their ads, many of them reaching legendary status as they are replayed as the best Super Bowl ads.

Not only does the Super Bowl give companies publicity, but it also gives its halftime performers a good amount also. Who can forget the Janet Jackson’s wardrobe malfunction in Super Bowl XXXVIII? According to TiVo, that incident was TV’s most rewound moment of all-time.

Vegas, evidently along with Janet Jackson, is elated every year come Super Bowl time. The Super Bowl is the most wagered sporting event of the year. Millions of dollars will trade hands, and this year projections show a record-breaking amount of money will be wagered. After it is all said and done, some will profit while others helplessly regret their wagers (Indianapolis is currently the favorite by 6.5 points).

All the extras aside, the Super Bowl itself is the championship game in football that is played by the two remaining teams in the playoffs. This year in Super Bowl XLI, the Chicago Bears, along with its horrendous quarterback Rex Grossman, will face the Indianapolis Colts on February 4.

Whoever wins will claim glory, fame, and a piece of football history. Losers go home, forever forgotten. Remember who the New England Patriots played in Super Bowl XXXVI just five years ago? Neither do I, but like me, you probably do remember Tom Brady’s touchdown pass and Adam Vinatieri’s game-winning field goal.

Fact is, America’s heart has been captured by the Super Bowl ever since 1967 when Super Bowl I became a part of American history. And it doesn’t look like this is going to change anytime soon. So when February 4 comes along, sit down, grab some popcorn, and let yourself become part of American tradition.

—Ranny Ma

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 5:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Earlier today, fellow Gargoyle staff member Alan Liang posted an entry about two hot topics of high school: sleep and homework. “What can be done?” he asks at the end.

Well, really — what can be done? After reading quite a few news articles and studies about school start times and adolescents’ sleep issues, I definitely think that sleep deprivation in high schoolers is a serious problem, and that not enough is being done to address it. Abolishing homework entirely would probably make a huge difference, but that’s not a viable option at the moment. (Or is it?)

Instead, one solution that’s commonly suggested — both by students and medical professionals — is that schools should start later.

But wouldn’t starting school later just entice students to sleep later in the night as well? Yeah, probably. But because teens’ biological sleep patterns naturally favor later sleep and wake times, seven hours of sleep from 11 p.m. to 6 a.m. doesn’t feel the same as seven hours from 2 a.m. to 9 a.m. You might have even figured that out just from personal experience.

Take a moment to think about it, though. Uni students are actually quite lucky. Our first period begins at 8 a.m. — some schools start way earlier. But, especially after staying up late at night, I often feel that 8 isn’t early enough — 9 would be much better. Of course, even later than that would be more ideal, but with an eight-hour school day, we’d have to pack or bring money for both lunch and dinner if that were the case.

Alas, when all’s said and done, it’s unlikely that Uni’s schedule will change before my (expected) graduation two years from now. But that doesn’t mean that alleviating the sleep deprivation problem is out of the question. The Mayo Clinic has a few suggestions.

One of those is to reset your circadian clock. “It takes a little effort,” they say — I suppose the difficulty of doing this will depend on your willingness and desire to feel less tired during the day.

The resetting process in itself isn’t too hard. Here’s what the Mayo Clinic says:

Exposing your child to bright light in the mornings will help his or her body realize that it is time to wake up. A device called a light box can provide enough light to enhance early morning alertness. At the opposite extreme, being in subdued light or darkness at bedtime signals the body that it’s time to sleep.

Actually, there are even products out there to do this for you — but they’re not cheap.

The Mayo Clinic continues:

Another method of readjusting a malfunctioning biological clock is called chronotherapy. In a teenager, this most often involves delaying bedtime by two or three hours every night for a progression of nights. For example, if your teen regularly goes to bed at 3 a.m., the first night he or she would stay up until 6 a.m. The next night, he or she would stay up until 9 a.m. This continues until a socially acceptable bedtime is reached.

Products containing melatonin, a sleep-inducing hormone, help some people reset their circadian clocks. Taking the product about five hours before bedtime usually produces the best results. While these supplements can be purchased without a prescription, they should be taken under the supervision of a doctor.

The Mayo Clinic experts also add that it helps to sleep and wake up on the same time during weekends and holidays as you do on school days, but that’s probably even harder to accomplish for various reasons. But again, it’s something that those individuals determined to synchronize their biological sleep patterns with Uni’s start time will do ….

Obviously, if you do the same amount of stuff in a day after you change your sleeping habits, then resetting your circadian clock won’t make you sleep longer. But it should certainly help daytime sleepiness — aka falling asleep in class.

And it also means that to get the same amount of sleep as you normally do, you’re going to have to sleep earlier at night — which means that you’d need to spend some time before school to finish up homework (or whatever, really). Some people have told me that it’s better to finish up homework or studying early in the morning before school than late at night, but I don’t know what their sleeping patterns are like.

All in all, if you actually manage to sync your sleep schedule with Uni’s school schedule, you should feel much more energetic during the day. And especially during the first couple of days, I’m sure that that would be a very pleasant feeling. Even if it somehow doesn’t have much of an effect on you, at least it’s worth a try — isn’t it?

— Jason He

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 2:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

What’s something that you don’t want to do, but can’t get enough of?

No, not drugs. For me, it’s sleep. Sleeping. It’s not as if I absolutely refuse to get into bed — I don’t try to stay up intentionally. However, sometimes it seems as if there are more pressing matters at hand, like homework.

Homework is assigned to help improve understanding. Homework is useful for developing problem-solving techniques. I agree with teachers; homework is definitely an important part of teaching. What I don’t agree with is putting excessive pressure on students by assigning way too much homework, especially when other teachers are doing the same thing at the same time.

Way too much homework consists of layering tests in the same week, pushing for more than 30 minutes an assignment, and piling up projects. Most Uni students should understand this scenario. The most stressful times usually come up at the end of quarters, but some weeks are pure hell.

Way too much homework doesn’t affect just one day — it screws up an entire week. After the initial lack-of-sleep night, I, personally, tend to sleep in class. Not only do I give a bad impression to my teachers, but I also don’t get an understanding of the material. I go home and stay up later than usual trying to finish homework that I don’t understand and the next morning I fall asleep again, successfully ruining my week. If not for weekends, I’d probably fail all my classes.

So what can be done? I’m still not sure at the moment, but I’ll be sure to sleep on it when I get the time.

— Alan Liang

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 11:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Working at Kumon, a math and reading center for children, has taught me to appreciate my first grade teachers. I don’t think elementary teachers get nearly enough credit for what they do. Not that high school and college teachers shouldn’t be appreciated but young children are one of the hardest-to-reach age groups.

I discovered that it takes a certain quality and ability to be able to hold a child’s attention. In Kumon this is slightly easier since these kids are already motivated, or pushed by their parents, to work hard. Still, kids will be kids, and trying to explain addition to a 5-year-old isn’t the easiest thing in the world, especially if they aren’t supposed to count on their fingers.

Explaining isn’t the only problem, though. In fact, that’s one of the easier parts. Getting a kid to concentrate on math is hard to do when there are interesting treasures to be found inside their noses. Yet you have to hide your emotions and patiently try to keep them working.

Patience. If there’s one thing you learn it’s patience. Kids hold all sorts of odd habits, and some of them can really get on your nerves. Some keep falling asleep and so it’s impossible to get them to finish in under an hour even with constant supervision. And then there are the few worksheets filled with artwork, so you have to find the answers yet even when you do it’s so messy that it takes a little bit of imagination to figure out what it says. It’s enough to drive anyone up the wall, and it definitely makes you sympathize with teachers.

When it’s all said and done, though, I feel a certain satisfaction in having done my part to help others. Yet no matter how terrible they are, kids are still cute and it’s impossible not to smile at them. After all, you were once a little kid, too.

—Avanti Chajed

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 8:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I’m a person who, on occasion, likes to complain.

The only thing is, I usually have to go out of my way to find some obscure, usually inconsequential topic to complain about. Today, on the other hand, the job was done for me.

Even before I got to school, I was sick of crossword puzzles. The one I had attempted in the News Gazette the night before was still sitting on the counter, unfinished except for one or two obvious answers. When I got to school, I largely forgot about it, and everything was fine until second period.

While sitting in the lounge, I saw two people working on a pair of crossword puzzles, and they were doing pretty well. That’s when I hit the roof.

How is it possible that I can be so much worse at those puzzles than almost everybody else I talk to? Within my family, my sister is better than I am, my dad is better than I am, and even my grandmother is better than I am! And people at Uni? Forget about it!

But that realization got me thinking; why do people even bother working on these things? When you think about it, the idea of filling a bunch of unrelated trivia into a small boxlike region is pretty strange, and completely unnecessary.

Would it be so hard for the New York Times to make a crossword puzzle that I would be able to figure out? How am I supposed to figure out a four-letter word for “tear down, in England?” Honestly.

Wouldn’t we all be happier if we spent our time doing something more meaningful than filling letters into small boxes? You could take a walk. Or write a letter. Or work on a Sudoku puzzle.

A four-letter first name of someone who is sick of crossword puzzles? Take a guess.

—Carl Zielinski

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 12:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Yesterday’s PAC (Prejudice Awareness Club) discussion question was, “If you were at a party, and somebody used a racial slur, how would you react?”

Would you:

a) Freak out and chew them out.
b) Take them aside and give them a well-worded, intellectually engaging lecture about the negative effects of racism and stereotypes.
c) Ignore them and walk away.

I would go with option c. Although the person at the party is wrong for using a racial slur, it would seem hypocritical for me to try and correct them. After all, whether everyone admits to it or not, everyone is a little bit racist.

Sometime in history class last year or the year before, the observation that the North is actually more racist than the South was brought up. Although it’s hard to quantify if the North is more racist than the South, it is undeniable that racism in the North is much more subtle.

Although I’ve personally never been to the South (so, yes, ironically I’m basing my assumptions of the South off stereotypes), from hearing stories of Confederate flags still waving on front porches to rocks being thrown at cars with Northern license plates, I can surmise the South is more blatant about being racist.

In the North, however, racism is covered up with politeness and good etiquette. In fact, I would say that the majority of people are in denial that they are racist.

I would attribute this denial, in part, to the explosion of various PC-isms that are flooding our society. Being politically correct gets you off the hook. It makes sense, too. If you’re not doing anything offensive or saying anything offensive, then you’re obviously not being racist. But is being PC enough?

Obviously, institutionalized racism has negative effects. Could it be that PC terms are perpetuating this nasty cycle? With the obsession of being politically correct, racism is just being shoved underground and is showing up in subtle ways.

In the future, despite the increasingly politically correct, sterilized population, racism will still be an issue, I guarantee you this. So how will the issue be targeted? Will it even be possible to target it?

And lastly, for your amusement, visit: pcphrases.com.

— Andrea Park

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 10:25 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Recently, Andrea Park and I were planning to write a story about what Uni students think is a “hot body.” It was going to act as a sidebar to a body image story Michelle Gao and Erin Hayes were writing. However, I got an e-mail from Ms. Kovacs saying that a story like that may be in danger of becoming a sexual harassment issue, due to the student handbook which says that making “hot lists” is off limits.

But why, from a research standpoint, would asking Uni students what they think of as attractive be a form of sexual harassment. Isn’t it a vaild goal to find out what Uni kids think of as hot in comparison with the rest of the world? Similar to the bullying survey we took a few years ago, this story would be looking at what importance Uni students place behind physical aspects, and what kind of traits they look for.

To be fair, Ms. Kovacs did say that we just needed to be careful, not necessarily terminate the story idea. Nevertheless, it scared me and Andrea off.

I think that it is a shame that such limits need to placed around stories like this. Of course, I understand Ms. Kovacs point. A student reading about what others think of as attractive might feel uncomfortable if they don’t fit any of the descriptions being laid out.

But at the same time, isn’t finding out what Uni students think about bodies the same thing as finding out what Uni students think about anything. A Republican student may feel uncomfortable reading a story that says a majority of Uni students are Democratic.

In truth, it is kind of a small matter. If something you do or say causes discomfort to another, you should try to refrain from doing or saying it. Still, I feel a sense of remorse for the investigative story that shall never be written.

—Sarah Pfander

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 9:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

In October of 2006, Yale freshman Jian Li filed a civil rights complaint against Princeton University for rejecting his application for admission. He claimed that he was discriminated against because his application was rejected on the basis of his nationality; Asian American.

“Theoretically, affirmative action is supposed to take spots away from white applicants and redistribute them to underrepresented minorities,” Li told the Daily Princetonian. “What’s happening is one segment of the minority population is losing places to another segment of minorities, namely Asians to underrepresented minorities.”

Li points to a study conducted by two Princeton professors which concluded that if colleges were to remove the consideration of race from the admissions process that white applicants would feel little effect. Asian students, on the other hand, would fill nearly four out of every five places in admitted class that are currently taken by African American or Hispanic students.

Dare I say there exists a quota that limits the number of Asian students that are being accepted into elite colleges? This situation bears a striking resemblance to the quota used in the 20th century by institutions such as Harvard and Yale to keep Jews out of the Ivy League. In today’s supposedly more progressive and politically correct society we recognize that this was a discriminatory act.

A. Lawrence Lowell, Harvard’s president during this time boldly stated that Jews were a detriment to the school. “The summer hotel that is ruined by admitting Jews meets its fate … because they drive away the Gentiles, and then after the Gentiles have left, they leave also.”

They claimed that they weren’t admitting Jews not because they weren’t qualified but because having them would change the “feel” of the school. The same thing is happening today and we’re using affirmative action as a tool to accomplish it. We’ve also given that “feeling” a new name: diversity.

The irony in this is that it is becoming more and more apparent that the supposed benefits of affirmative action and diversity in education are often ephemeral and practically nonexistent.

Peter Kirsanow, a member of the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights, says that black students are often admitted into universities above their skill level and end up doing poorly and being unable to compete with their classmates.

This mismatch caused by affirmative action has been noticed by UCLA law professor Richard Sander, who found that nearly half of black law students reside in the bottom ten percent of their law-school classes.

Kirsanow asks: “Would college administrators continue to mouth platitudes about affirmative action if their students knew that preferential admissions cause black law students to flunk out at two-and-a-half times the rate of whites? Or that black law students are six times less likely to pass the bar? Or that half of black law students never become lawyers?”

The call for the removal of affirmative action in its entirety may be a little too rash, because I have seen many who have benefited from the system. It is essential; however, to have the gumption to call a spade a spade and realize that the diversity that college campuses try and create comes at the expense of an Asian population which is severely being discriminated against.

— Shivani Khanna

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 7:04 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Oh, no. Everything seems to be going wrong. You dropped your books in the hall, and it took forever to pick them up, and then the elevator wouldn’t come because some idiot was probably holding it open on another floor. After waiting for what seemed like hours, you had to make the decision to sprint up the stairs and down the hall to make it to your next class.

Except that your perfect plan comes to a screeching halt (literally), because there is a group of students walking slowly down the middle of the hall, talking, laughing, joking. You stare at them, aghast. Don’t they have classes to go to? They are moving slower than you thought to be humanly possible. It is impossible to go around them, because they have spread themselves out to form a ragged line across the hallway, and you are forced to clench your fists with frustration and resign yourself to being late.

I understand that people need to talk during passing periods, since talking in class is frowned upon (for some reason). But would it really be so hard to take the conversation to the side of the hallway? If you share your next class with the person you need to talk to, couldn’t you walk to class, and then chat in the classroom before the bell rings?

Those were rhetorical questions to which the answers were both yes, by the way.

Blocking a hallway (or staircase, for that matter) is only going to make others late for their classes or mad at the people doing the blocking. So really, guys. If you need to talk with someone, go ahead. But not in other peoples’ way.

— Michelle Gao

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 10:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I’ve been working on a lot of things for the OG, some of which are behind the scenes and some of which will be unveiled in the next couple of weeks. But that’s still no reason to ignore the small things! To that end, I’m asking everyone who reads this blog, which hopefully is more than a few people in the journalism class, what feature they’d like to have on the OG. I can guarantee that I’m probably already working on the big features, which I’m not going to mention here so as to maintain some element of surprise.

Anyway, feel free to comment on “small” changes you’d like to see to the OG. Some that jump to my mind are:

• Emoticon/ Smiley support in comments
• Faster Searching
• Calendar of upcoming events
• More RSS feeds
• Anything else? Leave a comment!

Thanks everyone! -Ben Hyman, editor-in-chief, Online Gargoyle

Posted by bhyman at 11:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Uni has been a great place to learn new things. A great place to broaden your horizons. To get the chance to play new sports. To experience different cultures. I’ve realized, though, that throughout your time as a Uni student, you adapt skills that aren’t taught via textbook.

For example, it isn’t a secret that at Uni we are given hours worth of homework, and for those of us doing afterschool activities, this can mean not even starting on work until 9 p.m. So what do we do?

We find a way out of it. We do the important time-consuming work once we get home. Then you save the “quick homework” to do during free periods and lunch. If there’s anything that is left over, you get online and ask for help from people who have already completed it, asking questions about how to best approach the homework (e.g., “Do you really have to do the reading?” or “How long did it take you?”)

I guess some people would call this prioritizing, but it’s a type of prioritizing that isn’t really benefiting you.

It also doesn’t help when each teacher thinks that their class is the most important class, seeming completely oblivious to the fact that each student has up to seven other classes as well. “Oh, it’s a little over 30 minutes worth of homework, but you should be able to get it done,” doesn’t hold true if each teacher gives out 45 minutes of homework instead of the regular 30. That can potentially be up to two hours extra! And we only ‘prioritize’ even more.

As the history department might point out, it is just one giant feedback cycle.

— Lizzy Warner

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 9:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Procrastination.

It comes in all shapes and sizes. Maybe you just slack off on writing that paper due on Friday. Maybe you choose to work on homework that could easily be done during lunch or a free period to put off the real work for just a little longer.

It seems so harmless when you’re doing it. You can fool yourself, saying that you’ll start in five more minutes. But after that there are five more minutes, aren’t there? It is a dreadful cycle that keeps going like the Energizer Bunny.

But at one point or another we all realize that there is no more time to mess around, and we seriously have to get down to work. However, this often comes too late for us to really make good use of our time. There is little time to stop and think. Some of us work well under stress, or so we tell ourselves. But out work may turn out sloppy and rushed where we could easily have done better given just a little more time. All the suffering in the short amount of time that we actually work could be prevented if we just used the extra time that we had. Our quality of work and our grades would probably improve if we just sat down and did our work at the beginning.

We all know this. Yet procrastination still remains oh so very … alluring.

— Deren Kudeki

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 9:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

A few weeks ago I wrote an article on procrastination, in particular the concept of senioritis. That was first semester. Now that its spring semester, I see that many Uni seniors have officially succumbed to the disease. And why not? College apps have all been sent. The last part of the application, the Midyear Report, only goes up to the first semester of the final year of high school. By the time second semester finishes, seniors will already have decided which college they are attending.

Nonetheless, seniors are warned of the dangers of slacking. According to College Board, about half of college students need to take remedial courses because they “do not have adequate academic preparation.” Perhaps more surprising is that “more than one quarter of the freshmen at four-year colleges and nearly half of those at two-year colleges do not even make it to their sophomore year.” However, most top colleges have much a higher retention percentage. Even large state universities such as the U of I have roughly 90% freshmen returning for at least another year.

Surely, someone must have found a cure for this devastating disease. I recently read an article from Time magazine entitled How to Combat Senioritis. One strategy the article mentioned was to enroll seniors in internships for college credit. The Wise Individualized Senior Experience (WISE) program (not to be confused with WYSE) is a paradigm. Spanning 70 high schools in eleven states, the organization gives students opportunities to see, among other things, how academics are connected to their future goals and interests. Others enroll in dual-enrollment programs at local colleges, giving them both a more realistic view of the intensity of college coursework and a chance to get ahead. Essentially the philosophy is that the more high school students work ahead, the more interested they get in high school.

But it doesn’t mean a little slacking here and there is all that bad. Most seniors slack a bit, and many end up doing fine, some even claiming that college is a letdown compared to high school in terms of the academic intensity. And seriously, high school seniors deserve a little break here and there after taking a multitude of standardized tests and completing all those college apps.

I am currently taking a college-level Anatomy & Physiology class, and unfortunately, I don’t think my motivation has increased a significant amount because of it. But now that second semester has rolled in, I am determined to motivate myself. Right after I take this quick nap.

— Benjamin Fu

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 9:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

This morning, while flipping through a copy of Teen Vogue, I came across the picture of a ridiculously skinny model in an ad for Miu Miu. I was awfully disturbed by what I saw. Is the company trying to advocate popped-out collar bones? Is this supposed to be attractive? What’s happening to our society’s idea of beauty?

In history class a few days ago, we learned that the Stone Age carving of Venus of Willendorf has often been seen as the first ideal depiction of female beauty. Her figure would most definitely be considered obese in today’s world. However, her body was the envy of women during the Stone Age. Her plumpness symbolized fertility and success, which were important to the hunting and gathering society of that time.

Even during the Renaissance, voluptuousness was still seen as beautiful. In the famous painting “The Birth of Venus” by Sandro Botticelli, Venus, the goddess of love and beauty, was depicted with a curvaceous figure. Although it’s no comparison to the Venus of Willendorf, the goddess would still by no means be considered “thin.”

Our obsession with thinness today can probably be traced back to the 1960s fashion model Lesley Hornby (Twiggy). At 5 feet 6 inches and 91 pounds, Twiggy took the fashion world by storm by flaunting her boyish, waif-thin body. Along with her popularity came the “Thin is in” slogan.

In America today, it’s no secret that there’s a growing obesity epidemic. On the other extreme end of the problem, the number of eating disorder cases, such as anorexia and bulimia, has also increased drastically over the past few decades. A disease unknown to people 100 years ago now affects approximately one in 100 teenage girls. Other appearance-altering methods such as plastic surgery and liposuction are also becoming increasingly popular.

The media has certainly played its part in changing people’s ideas of beauty. Each day, teenage girls are bombarded with hundreds of ads for diet pills, weight-loss programs, low-fat foods, and images of extremely thin celebrities like Nicole Richie and Mischa Barton. Despite most magazines’ claims that they feature women of “all shapes and sizes,” images of thin models undoubtedly prevail over more voluptuous models.

Personally, I don’t support this craze for thinness. Why should everyone strive for the same figure? Different people look good in different body shapes. Who’s to decide what’s beautiful? The latest copy of Vogue? Certainly not.

After all, what is beauty but something perceived by our senses? As Plato once said, “Because we trust our senses, we are like prisoners in a cave — we mistake shadows on a wall for reality.”

You’ve probably heard this before, but it’s true; you shouldn’t judge people based on their physical appearance. Look beyond the surface. What defines a person is what’s in their heart, not what they look like on the outside.

— Elaine Gu

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 9:46 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Isaac Chambers recently wrote a column exploring the relationships between responsibility and privilege, as well as those between age and maturity. I had mixed reactions to the column, but it contained one argument that I strongly agree with, quoted here:

“That’s not to say that all people over the legal age granting someone a privilege are responsible enough to deal with that privilege, or by the same token, that all people under the legal age aren’t responsible enough. There are plenty of people over 17 who make stupid sexual decisions and plenty of people over the age of 21 who drive under the influence.”

It is a constant source of irritation to me that age is used to reflect such things as responsibility and capability. Sure, people are bound to become more responsible as they age, but the speeds at which they do so can be radically different. If a 13 or 14-year-old who has been driving from an early age shows up at the DMV fully capable of acing the test and making intelligent decisions on the road asking for a license, they’ll leave empty-handed because, since the time they were born, the Earth has completed fewer than 16 revolutions around the sun.

However, if a 16-year-old walks in and shows that they have the basic ability to operate a vehicle, they can walk away with a shiny new license, and as soon as they hit the legal age for drinking, they can celebrate by crashing their car into a tree. Many young drivers only see getting a license as a right, and not in any way a responsibility. As an extreme example, I’ve heard of people who drive down Springfield Avenue with their eyes closed as a test of fortitude.

Such an impersonal system as the one in place to issue drivers’ licenses is, of course, far from being the main cause of accidents, but it has clear inherent flaws, based around the notion that any given 20-year-old is more responsible than someone three years younger. Some of the age limits imposed by legislators are remarkably fallible; minors can get their hands on alcohol if they’re reasonably determined. One proposed solution has been to raise the age limits for driving and buying alcohol, but this only antagonizes minors further, both the ones who are responsible enough to handle whatever it is they’re being denied and the ones who aren’t.

This situation is an excellent example of the ethical paradoxes that our government faces. On the one hand, granting inherent-risk privileges such as the right to drive should be done on a highly personal basis to ensure the safety of the recipient and the people who could potentially be affected by their actions. However, as the level of individual attention increases, the operation becomes increasingly expensive and time-consuming. Also, there is virtually no way to predict how a person would react in a situation; it would be a bit much to conduct full psychological exams only to produce largely irrelevant results. Striking a balance between being personal and being practical should be the government’s aim.

— Andrew Lovdahl

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 12:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I’m sure everyone has heard about the upcoming school event Class Wars, but just in case you haven’t, here’s a recap: The idea is for each class to host two contests; classes collect points by winning contests or by an individual students merit (e.g. winning an outside contest, turning in excellent work in class, etc.); the class that gets the most points wins a prize.

The idea, proposed by sophomore Isaac Chambers, is based off of the House Cup (basically the same idea, but divided into houses not classes) in the series “Harry Potter.” Chambers maintains that the event will help establish class unity. I say, Isaac, you should have done your homework a little better. Yes, in the “Harry Potter” series the houses are very unified, but it is the inter-house bad blood that causes so many problems within Hogwart’s thick stone walls. In fact, in the fifth book of the series, “Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix,” the sorting hat (which sorts Hogwarts students into their houses) warns the school in its opening song that the houses should pull together and unify if they don’t want to fall to the series’ villain, Lord Voldemort.

I have to tell you, I’m scared. If the classes at Uni become even more hostile toward each other, there might be riots in the hallways (not to mention we could be more prone to Voldemort attacks). Sure, class unity is a good thing, but school unity would be even better. Maybe we could have a war against another school, we could have a street fight, or a dance-off. Or, if that’s a little too hard to organize, all the classes could just gang up on the subbies. They don’t count anyway, right (relax, I’m being sarcastic). If the school insists on continuing Class Wars, at least make defeating Lord Voldemort one of the challenges.

— Bethany Hutchens

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 10:54 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Today, I got lost on my way to the post office. Two years going on three in this town and I still get lost when I attempt to run errands. And not just any errand, today I was sending out my final college application in a standard brown envelope.

This momentous occasion definitely inspired me to do some reflecting about the whole process I had just completed. I mean, I completed the college application process. As my dad so very reassuredly keeps telling me, “Dana, stop worrying. Even if your essay was awful, there is nothing you can do at this point. Your part is done.” Hmm, thanks father dearest.

Several months ago, when I began to fill out the applications, I thought I knew what I was getting myself into. The grueling throes of the college admissions process. Essays that have to be worded, reworded, and then reworded again. Resumes that need to be pored over countless amounts of times. But where was it?

Is it just me or did the college application process most definitely not live up to all of the hype? I mean, does this resonate at all with any of my fellow 07-ers? Or am I just being absolutely crazy?

The applications were tedious, long, and at times, a little bit stressful. But who are we kidding? We’ve all had nights of homework that would make even the most daunting college application pale in comparison.

The only part that proved to be rather difficult was simply making enough time to sit down and have some quality time with the application. I was maintaining a regular course load with plenty of homework and tests along with a Saturday anatomy lab and daily extracurriculars, and then was expected to be able to find time to write a college essay about exactly what kept me so busy? Right.

For those who will be applying in the future, these applications are not a big deal. Seriously. And not because success should be individually defined, because let’s face it, we’ve been hearing that a lot. So I’m not going to say it again.

What I am going to say is that your transcript has been compiling since your freshman year. Your teachers already like or dislike you. Your resume has already been coming together since the day you joined subbie basketball. You can’t really change who you are to automatically become the perfect looking student on paper. It’s all been in the making for a while now.

A college application is important, but all of the hype is near ridiculous. You don’t need to have the perfect essay, you need to have a personally expressive one. You don’t need to spend hours contemplating which pen to use for your signature, just sign your name correctly spelled.

Besides, we’ve all kind of done this before. We did fill out applications to come here, right?

And one piece of personal advice, use the most amazing stamps you can find on your envelope and possibly sprinkle some potpurri on if you are feeling particularly Martha Stewart-ish (pre-prison). As I always say, a floral scented college application is a happy college application.

-Dana Al-Qadi

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 5:58 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Today in History, I had one of those moments. You know, a moment. A point in time when you wish the ground would open and swallow you up. And now that I think about it, this is the second moment that I’ve had in History. And both have involved coffee.

I have a dreadful, dreadful time trying to stay awake in History, because it’s my first-hour class. It’s very fortunate, though, that my teacher happens to be Mr. Sutton, who is extremely nice and makes coffee.

My first coffee moment happened… well, I think it was a couple of months ago. But anyway. I was bearing a used coffee filter filled with icky, soggy coffee grounds across the room to throw away. I was literally a foot away from the trash can when the filter decided to tear and spill its (disgusting!) contents all. Over. The. Floor.

Erin Hayes, being the wonderful person that she is, helped me run back and forth from the bathroom to the classroom with paper towels to clean up the mess.

Has the word “embarrassing” come to mind, yet?

Today was (dare I say it?) even worse.

A pot of coffee had already been emptied between Mr. Sutton, TJ, Julian, and Erin. So I raised my hand and asked, “Mr. Sutton? Can we make more coffee? Because I really want some.”

Eventually, TJ was sent off to the boys’ bathroom for more water, and Julian replaced the used coffee filter with a new one (without spilling anything). A little while later, Mr. Sutton informed me that the coffee was ready.

I started to walk over to the coffeepot, and was faced with a dilemma: Mr. Sutton had his feet propped up on JJ’s desk, and I couldn’t get past him. Oh well, not a problem. I would just crawl under them.

The crawling went just fine, but the getting up was an entirely different matter altogether. (This is the beginning of my moment, by the way.) Without looking to see what I was doing, I reached for the corner of Mr. Sutton’s desk to pull myself back up.

I hadn’t realized that his almost-full cup of coffee was sitting on that corner. I’m not kidding when I tell you that time slowed down for a second. The mug toppled into my hands, warm coffee spilling over them and down my left arm, splashing onto the floor. I made a mad grab at the mug, but it slipped out of my hands and crashed into a million little pieces on the floor.

… Actually, I’m just kidding about that last part. It kind of just crashed to the floor and lay there amidst a growing coffee puddle. I had a huge wet spot along my right thigh, and the left arm of my sweater was absolutely soaked.

“My cup!” Mr. Sutton cried, picking it up and turning it back and forth. I stared at it for a second, knowing that something was off about it, but not knowing quite what.

Oh, nononoNO, I thought when realization hit me.

The handle of the mug had disappeared.

After about three trips back and forth from the bathroom for paper towels (does this sound familiar? And just how much coffee can a cup hold, really?!), the lake on the floor was almost gone. I couldn’t find the missing handle anywhere.

You must know that during this entire episode, there was a background of uproarious laughter. I returned, shamefaced, to my seat.

A few minutes later, Mr. Sutton asked if I still wanted coffee. I widened my eyes at him slightly. And risk more danger? I already had a huge coffee stain on my right thigh. “No,” I said.

Eventually, Lucy got up and fetched me a cup of coffee, which I accepted very, very carefully. And then sat in class for the rest of the 90-minute period and sipped it very, very slowly, aware of an icky brown stain on my jeans and waited desperately for the caffeine to work. I hoped that all my bad luck in History meant that I wouldn’t fail my Physics final.

I really must have offended the Coffee God somehow.

— Michelle Gao

Posted by Gargoyle Staff at 4:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Everyone seems to be fully aware that throughout the years Uni has been classified as a “nerd school”; chess is our best sport and we all happen to rock at DDR. However, we would like to be able to say we’re just as much of a badass school as the next. So are we?

Aside from the new problems that come and go within a couple of years (e.g. blogging, cliques, etc.) there have been a few recurring problems, cheating being one of them (it’s an age-old thing).

You’re looking at your test and you know how to do the problem, but you’re just a little stuck, so you peer over at your neighbor’s paper to get you started; it’ s nothing new. But we’re Uni students, and this primitive form of cheating is just so outdated!