SAVOY — Nervous, yet excited, we approached our destination carefully, appropriately camouflaged to blend into the indigenous populace. Fearful for our sanity yet excited at what the next few hours might hold, we entered with caution.

It was 10:32 p.m. on Thursday, Nov. 20, and we had ventured into the depths of the Savoy 16 to learn firsthand about the curious rituals of those commonly known as "Twi-hards." Dressed in Edward Cullen T-shirts, we are out late on a school night to experience the phenomenon of "Twilight"'s opening night.

In addition to the movie's really weird main male character calling his girlfriend (to whom he's giving a piggyback ride up a giant tree in the forest) a "spidermonkey," here are some of the other things that went on …

LAUREN "MRS. BLACK" PIESTER

Lauren is slightly embarrassed by her T-shirt. Gargoyle photo by Lor Sligar (click to enlarge)

It was territory I'd only stepped foot in once before, at the Borders midnight release party for "Breaking Dawn." Having only been a "fan" of the books for a couple of months at that point, I felt ridiculously out of place.

So this time, for the midnight showing of "Twilight," I was determined to be prepared. As I didn't have time to make myself a T-shirt, I had given fellow Gargoyle reporter Lor Sligar specific instructions as she made one for me: "Use glitter."

I prepared myself as best I could by French-braiding my hair into what I assumed to be appropriately fan-girlish pigtails. I also put on some bright green earrings, just because.

However, upon walking into the theater an hour and a half early, not only did I discover that there was already quite a large line of "Twilight" fans, but also that our disguise wasn't going to work nearly as well as we'd hoped.

Instead of homemade, fabric-painted, glittery “I Love Edward” shirts, the majority of organisms present (nearly all females between the ages of 12 and 20), were wearing fancy, screen-printed, professional movie-related shirts, bearing that absolutely awful poster, Edward’s sexily disheveled bronze hair resting right over their chests.

Our beautiful yet Walgreen’s-bought and hand-crafted shirts, totally lacking any evidence of Robert Pattinson, seemed downright shameful. We weren't fitting in with the ridiculous, squealing teenage girls we had grand plans to make fun of; instead, we were the joke.

No matter. I just used the fact that it was absolutely freezing both in and outside of the theater to don my coat for most of the time.

It was around 11 that they actually let us into the auditoriums. The one that Lor and I were in was completely sold out, but we managed to get seats that were somewhere near the middle. We were slightly surprised. There had been no screaming yet.

Before we knew it, it was 12:01 a.m. The lights were going down. I thought I could hear a few squeals, but nothing too major yet. Everyone clapped. There were a few more squeals. And then …

"HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE" TRAILER!!! The clapping escalated. The screaming began. There were obviously a lot of Harry Potter fans in the room. I turned to Lor and angrily lamented how that was what we would have been seeing at that moment if it weren't for the immense suckage of Warner Bros., which had delayed the film's release until next summer. She agreed. (We love Harry Potter!)

The trailer, the extremely, extremely excellent trailer, ended all too soon. Then there were some more trailers that bear no importance on my mind, and therefore I cannot remember them. No one else seemed to care either.

Then, the screen changed. The music got quieter. The Summit Entertainment logo appeared on screen, the screaming/squealing/gasping started up again, and it began.

What followed were two hours of silly faces, sexual tension, glistening sweat, funky hair, attractive people, and a whole lot of laughter. And I swear, it wasn't just Lor and I disrupting people's movie-going experience. It was everyone. The entire theater laughed for the entire movie, making it about a hundred times better.

As it turned out, I liked it. It was kind of ridiculous, and silly, and funny, and stupid, and irritating, and confusing, but it was also entertaining. Beyond entertaining. Awesome.

We shuffled, irritated, among the flood of people all headed for the door. It was 2:15 in the morning, and I had to drive, and there was school in six hours, and we wanted to go to sleep, and it was cold, and people just stopped in aisles and hallways anyway, as if that was a fantastic place to stand around and talk to friends at 2:15 in the morning!

I'm not sure if it was the sleep deprivation or if the movie had me hypnotized, but I was obsessed all day on Friday. "Twilight" was all I could think about. And if someone mentioned it, they immediately regretted it, because I could pretty much talk forever. I imitated facial expressions. I repeated dialogue. I laughed out loud at something my subconscious had just remembered.

My friends all hated me by the end of the day, but it was totally worth it. The entire experience was rather enlightening, just a sliver of the cultural phenomenon that the series has become for reasons I can't quite put my finger on.

And also, if Jacob Black didn't have an ugly wig on, he'd be so extremely attractive.

LOR "MRS. CULLEN" SLIGAR

Lor makes light of the awkwardness of her T-shirt. Gargoyle photo by Lauren Piester (click to enlarge)

The "Mrs. Cullen" thing might be misleading. If Jacob Black took off that stupid wig, he'd be way cuter than Edward Cullen. Actually, Edward's hair is pretty weird as well. Hmm. This movie kind of struggled, hair-wise.

Anyway, I made our beautiful T-shirts while watching TV, right after play practice. The front of Lauren's shirt proudly stated, "o.m.g. … i [heart] edward!," while the back stated in large letters, "Mrs. Cullen."

Mine was Edward's name in a sparkly pink heart, while the back said, "… is super fine." We looked amazing. Lauren even braided her hair into pigtails to really encompass the spirit of teen-girl fandom.

As Lauren so aptly mentioned, we were a bit out of place. Alas, no worries. I was proud of our extremely awesome shirts because they were super stellar and amazing. No amount of snide looks from little obsessive teens (and often, their parents) could bring me down.

After stuffing our faces with popcorn, cupcakes, and soda, we finally got let into the theater around 11 p.m. We sa … and sat … talked to some fellow Uni students and alumni about this and that. I ran into and visited a few friends in another theatre. But mostly, we were just impatient for the movie to start. I mean, midnight on a school night?

So around 12:01, though more like 12:10, the movie began. Scratch that, the previews began. And hot damn, am I impatient for "Harry Potter 6" to come out. I mean, really? Postponing that brilliance for a teeny-bopper vampire love flick? Definitely not making me a fan of the Warner Bros. Oh well. July!

"Twilight" was hilarious, right from the get-go. Everyone in the theater was cracking up the whole time, especially at how creepy Edward was sometimes.

Well, the beginning was cool. I really liked Kristen Stewart, who played Bella Swan, and the beginning of the movie was awesome. Especially Jacob … yeah, minus the hair, as I previously mentioned. But then Edward came on and was completely absurd; obviously, how could he be anything else?

The friend-group that Bella joined was absolutely the best. The two girls were hilarious and the guys were dorkily, obnoxiously cute. One problem with the movie is that I can't see who would pick creepy Edward instead of Eric (Justin Chon), Mike (Michael Welch), or Tyler (Gregory Tyree Boyce). They were adorable.

Anyway, eventually the movie ended. Spoiler alert: Edward does other creepy things at the end. But, I suppose in fangirl world, these weirdo moments could be considered … "cute."

Lauren and I tried to leave quickly because I had to use the bathroom and it was late and cold and we were sleepy. Except then there was a bunch of annoying girls in the row who insisted on just standing there and NOT MOVING. I was irritated.

So Lauren and and I left, tired, yet inexplicably ecstatic that we had just watched the most amazing movie ever. At least, until "Harry Potter 6" comes out.