im also half white, half pakistani. ive been to pakistan once and am really closer to the pakistani side of my family, but the biggest problem is that i dont speak urdu. i really have trouble with this because it is looked down upon by other pakistanis that dont understand how i didnt learn the language. as i have gotten older i have started worknig at my dads company when im not in college and and most people he works with are pakistani or indian. luckily they speak more english than urdu, but it really makes me an outsider. i do believe this will get better though because most pakistanis of my generation (im 20 by the way) speak english almost exclusively if theyre not around their family.