Uni High's third annual Cultural Fair is just a few days away. The Oct. 3 event promises to be spectacular, but organizers need your help to make it as good as it can be. To do our part, the Online Gargoyle is hosting a "Countdown to Cultural Fair '08," a daily update by the event's organizers. They'll let you know what they need, how things are going, and what you can look forward to. Our latest update comes from one of the student organizers, freshman Aramael Pena-Alcantara, who offers roadmap of sorts for planning your Cultural Fair experience.

URBANA — Guys, guess what is coming up this Friday?

Not just the FAIR.

The:

• Fun
• Alarstonishing
• Ingenious
• Recess

Well, guess what: You can plan your fair experience today.

Step 1

1. You run over to your locker and drop your stuff. You choose to run outside (Go to: D) or walk outside. (Go to: E)
2. You walk over to your locker and organize your stuff. You are truly a organized person. (Go to: E)
3. You head over to campus. (Go to: F)

Step 2

4. You rush outside and get to the free food, you face a short- to medium-size line. You take a large portion of food (Go to: G) or you decide that there are people behind you and take a small portion. (Go to: H)
5. You walk outside to get to the free food; bad luck, you face a long line and possibly no free food. On the brighter side you will not be breathing as if you just had fitness. (Go to: H)
6. You headed over to campus?!? What is up with you? The F.A.I.R. is going on so run back to Uni (Go to: I) or stay there (Go to: L).

Step 3

7. You have taken a large portion of free food. You go outside and eat with your friends. You leave and eat somewhere else (Go to: L) or stay for the entertainment. (Go to: J)
8. You take a small portion and are unsatisfied with the amount you took and return to find there is no more food, so you take some of your friend's, while he/she is not looking (or you can ask them). You decide to stay here (Go to: J) or you decide to leave. (Go to: L)
9. You have returned to Uni! Good for you! Unfortunately because you were gone you have to Go to: H.

Step 4

10. You have stayed for this long so you can watch the Step Competition or the rapper Krukid. You have enjoyed the fair, and it is time to talk. An announcement is made for all of you to go back to class. (Go to: M)
11. You left the F.A.I.R., so you don’t see any of the entertainment: a Step Competition and Krukid and other great performers.
    

    Step 5

12. You left so you did not hear the announcement to go to your next class; you did not keep track of time. So no, you're running as if you were in track. You arrive just in time for the second bell but your fair experience was horrible. Unfortunately that is the end for you.
13. You stayed for most if not all of the event and you know what it was a great experience; you tell your buddies, and that is that.

Well, good luck with your Cultural Fair if you are planning to go to campus — please do not.

The author of this article, the Online Gargoyle, the Cultural Fair volunteers, or any endorser of the Cultural Fair are or cannot be held responsible for what you plan to do on Cultural Fair day.